popcorn, anyone?

I have a bunch of different word documents open with a bunch of different thoughts half written on the page. I feel like whenever I first begin to form an opinion over something that I’m passionate about, I seem to do so in a bit of a fury. It’s funny, because I don’t think anyone on here has really seen that side of me. Unless you’ve happened to read my post about snakes or my recent ones about hoarders during this coronavirus pandemic.

I mean, it’s not a big mystery as to why. I’m just a bit of a coward at the moment. Or, maybe that’s too harsh, maybe I just don’t want to deal with conflict right now. I’m not ready for it. I know that in the current political climate I might say things that could send people spitting at the mouth, but just to calm anyone reading this, no you’re not reading the words of a hidden racist, sexist, whatever-ist, but I do think that some things are a little ridiculous, that as a self-professed liberal, I suppose I’m supposed to be all on board with.

For example, when a white person attempts to show how absolutely not racist they are with the new form of “I can’t be racist my friend is black” which now appears to be, “I can’t be racist look how much I’ll trash my own race.” Yeah, stuff like that annoys me. When there were multiple terrorist attacks happening by Islamists, I was on board the “not all muslims” train, and so I will not hop on some “all white person” train, I’ll remain on the “not all” and travel all the way to common sense station.

I don’t need to prove to anyone that I’m not racist by dragging my own race or, the more popular choice, dragging not only my race but the men in it. Sod off. I can say people of all races can be amazing and can be arseholes, that’s life. But, at the moment, defending my race somehow equates to thinking less of other races. I don’t think less of other races, I think we should be treated equally, and that means that I can disagree with someone of another race and it doesn’t mean I’m doing it because I’m racist. Actually, and this might blow some peoples minds, I can even dislike someone of another race and it still doesn’t mean I’m racist! And while I’m on this thought, I can also dislike and disagree with some women and still be a feminist. Being a feminist does not mean nodding my head to everything a woman says just because she’s a woman.

Maybe this has come from seeing some comments that I just think are dumb around the internet, and trust me, I see a fair share of racist nutjobs around too so no I’m not in the “racism doesn’t exist anymore” camp. Or, maybe it’s the idea of waving a female vice president like a carrot, and then upping that game to a black female vice president. What are we? As women, are we really a bait for voters? Are black women a tick box? Why not vote people based on merit or what policies they support (and just to note here: I’m fully aware that the majority of a country will have more of a chance to show their merit than the minority)? Women of all races and religions are their own people with their own merits, thoughts, opinions, passions and that is what should matter. I would very much support a voting system where we vote on policies alone, without seeing which party or person they are attached to. That would be interesting, wouldn’t it? To see who became the next leader of a country when people had to actually invest the time into what they were voting for, not just who.

Ahaha, and above I was saying I don’t like posting anything divisive and in one post I bring race, politics and gender. I’d be surprised if anyone took much from this though. Let’s face it, all of those things are incredibly complicated and it takes a lot more than we’re currently doing for there to be change – and I’m not so arrogant as to think I have the answers. I just sure as hell don’t think they’re in letting people attack me for the colour of my skin because if I saw anyone attacking someone else for the colour of their skin then I’d tell them to fuck right off. I really would. My nephews are mixed race and I’m not really in the party (in this post I’ve been on a train, camping and at a party!) of telling off my eldest if he punches some dumbass kid for saying something negative about his skin being darker. And no, I don’t promote violence, but I also don’t promote racism so it looks like we’re at a stalemate there. I’m sorry, I love that kid. I’d fight that little snot for him. Okay, I wouldn’t really. Or maybe… alright, moving on.

Anyway, I just don’t think we have it in us at the moment. Not in this world of heroes, victims and villains. We all want to slot into something and, you know what, as writers we can be very guilty in creating those parts for people to play. Heh, I mean let’s face it, and I swear this isn’t just to create a royal flush of things for people to get offended about, but let’s take a quick look at religion. If you’re an atheist like I am (I was actually a hymn monitor at school, how cool was I), then religion is nothing more than a bunch of writers creating a hell of a lot of blood shed for centuries. It’s, to me, the equivalent of a thousand years from now there being only four world religions: Gryffindor, Slytherin, Ravenclaw, and Hufflepuff and all four of them are engaged in a global battle of the religion supreme with some in-between trying to call for equality – let’s face it, it’d probably be the Hufflepuffs.

Ah, that was a ramble and a half. The way my mom jokingly puts it, when I’ve ranted about this or that, is that I’m trying to right the wrongs of the world. I wish I could! But, I can’t, so I guess I just get frustrated instead. I also constantly try to realign and question my way of thinking. I think that’s something we should all always try to do. It’s easy to get carried away by the media. I actually wrote a post about this during the impeachment trial, that of course, I never posted because I was worried about… who knows?

Anyway, I mean it when I say if I have upset anyone because of this post then I am sorry. My intention is never to hurt anyone’s feelings, ever. But, I do want to start talking about how I feel about things more often. I’m sure many will disagree, after all we all consume information with mountains of experiences on our shoulders. We’re all just our own walking talking universes, aren’t we? Gonna stop writing now, before I go on a rant about what if we really are all just in a simulator and being controlled? What if we really are on the Truman show…

*peers through blinds*

Hope you’re well and as an apology for bringing what can be seen as quite a negative post to your feed during this already negative time, I will include another comedian short!

Arbie X

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